Sitting In the Silence, an interview of Jami Attenberg by Maurice Carlos Ruffin
The Interview with Jami Attenberg.
The creator of #1000wordsofsummer.
In continuation of the new series featuring excellent newsletters by authors (either on substack or tiny letter) — here is another example by Maurice Carlos Ruffin, who kindly authorized us to run this piece (which just went out to his subscribers) at Assignment Magazine.
Craft assignment: Read your favorite author newsletter and construct your own epistolary essay, either in the relatively intimate, informal language of these types of newsletters — or in a more formal language, or like a political pamphlet, or like textbook chapter, or like a set of instructions. Enjoy! and see subscriber link below if you want to read more issues of the newsletter.
Author Bio for Jami Attenberg: Jami Attenberg has written about food, travel, books, relationships and urban life for The New York Times Magazine, The New Yorker, The Wall Street Journal, the Sunday Times, The Guardian, and others. She is a New York Times bestselling author of seven books of fiction, including The Middlesteins and All Grown Up, and, most recently, a memoir, I Came All This Way to Meet You: Writing Myself Home. Her work has been published in sixteen languages.
Her debut collection of stories, Instant Love, was published in 2006, followed by the novels The Kept Man and The Melting Season. Her fourth book, The Middlesteins, was published in October 2012. It appeared on The New York Times bestseller list, and was published in ten countries in 2013. It was also a finalist for both the Los Angeles Times Book Prize for Fiction and the St. Francis College Literary Prize. A fifth book, Saint Mazie, was published in 2015 and has been optioned by Fable Pictures. Her sixth book, All Grown Up, was published in 2017 and was a national bestseller, appearing on numerous year-end lists. Her most recent novel was All This Could Be Yours (2019), and also appeared on a number of year-end lists, and for which Kirkus dubbed her, “poet laureate of difficult families.”
Her memoir, I Came All This Way to Meet You: Writing Myself Home, was published in January 2021 by Ecco Books and Serpent’s Tail (UK).
She lives in New Orleans, LA.
Author Bio for Maurice Carlos Ruffin: Maurice Carlos Ruffin is the author of The Ones Who Don’t Say They Love You, which was published by One World Random House in August 2021. His first book, We Cast a Shadow, was a finalist for the PEN/Faulkner Award, the Dayton Literary Peace Prize, and the PEN America Open Book Prize. Ruffin is the winner of several literary prizes, including the Iowa Review Award in fiction. A New Orleans native, Ruffin is a professor of Creative Writing at Louisiana State University, and the 2020-2021 John and Renee Grisham Writer-in-Residence at the University of Mississippi.
Hello to new subscribers and welcome to Sitting in Silence, a newsletter for readers, writers, and thinkers. The Interview has become a popular feature for the newsletter. I love talking to writers of all stripes regarding their journeys. They never disappoint. This issue’s conversation is with Jami Attenberg.
Jami Attenberg is the bestselling author of many books in multiple genres, including her latest, I Came All This Way to Meet You: Writing Myself Home, which is now out in paperback. You also know her as the creator of the worldwide writing phenomenon #1000wordsofsummer. She is a dear friend. Jami is one of the kindest people I know and works diligently for her community in New Orleans. We first met around the publication of her novel, All Grown Up, but I feel like I’ve known Jami for decades.
Special note: Sitting in Silence has an app now! iPhone users are invited to download the app today.
And now for our talk…
Maurice: What are your earliest memories of reading or writing stories?
Jami: My earliest memory of reading was actually off the back of cereal boxes, probably when I was around four years old. That was how I learned to read. I don't remember much about children's books necessarily, or even being read to, but I recall loving D'Aulaires Book of Greek Myths, being deeply fascinated with it, and also tearing through my mother's crumbling collection of Nancy Drew mysteries. My mother used to take me to the library for hours and I zoomed through everything in my age range. I also loved collections of old comics I would find at the library, like a hundred pages of Little Orphan Annie, and just being fascinated with learning her backstory. I started writing stories myself when I was five years old, and because I received praise for it from my teacher and my mother -- I think an early story won some kind of competition -- it made me want to write more. It was nice to feel like I was good at something. I also think I felt satisfaction at creating a beginning, middle and an end to something. I liked solving the problem of a story.
Maurice: Yeah. I think we underestimate the importance of encouragement in our writing lives. When did you know that you were a writer? Did you have early role models? What was an early move you made to create the writer we know today?
Jami: I don't know if there was a cross-the-threshold moment that I knew I was a writer exactly. And perhaps I don't even know what it means to be a writer, although I do know it's a thing you need to claim for yourself if you ever want to pursue it. People are afraid to say it out loud, but really anyone can do it, and enjoy it, and benefit from it, even if it's not what they do for a living. There is perhaps a leap from "trying to be a writer" and "being a writer" that comes with selling your work for a while, essays, short stories, journalism, a first book. But I know plenty of people who don't receive financial remuneration for their work that I would consider a writer.
I'm not really answering your question here though. So, let's see...I suppose in high school, I knew that I was good at it, better at it than anything else I was doing. It was the thing that interested me the most. I was editor of the school paper, participated in after school writing programs, and was very luckily in a community that had a solid educational program to support my interests. My first creative writing teacher was a man named Tod Lacey, and he was extremely encouraging. I think I wrote to impress him.
I got an undergrad degree in creative writing, but I did not necessarily pursue being a writer doggedly until my late twenties, early thirties. Not in that "always be submitting" way. I didn't feel like I fit into that conventional mold. The way I found my voice was through the zine scene and then also through the internet. Just really diving into voicey first person kind of stuff, it was helpful to finding my way to the way I write now.
Maurice: Can you talk more about your "diving into voicey first person kind of stuff?" I remember after we first met, and you graciously handed me a copy of All Grown Up. I recall lying in bed reading that one and thinking, "why do I feel like I'm completely inside this main character's head? Is this safe? Will I be able to make it back out? LOL" The point being that you have such a gift for putting intimacy on the page, which is so hard to do. It's such a pleasurable experience for the reader. And you do it so well in all of your books! How do you do it?
Jami: I just write the characters till they sound like someone I know or would want to know or maybe would meet sometime. I have been traveling these past two weeks and meeting and observing lots of new people and have been thinking about how everyone shows you their weirdness eventually. If you keep talking to people long enough, they'll let something slip. And that's the stuff I'm interested in. So, I just keep writing characters long enough until they show me their weirdness. I write conversations they have with other people even if I'll never use it in the final text, just to see what they would say. I put them in different situations that have nothing to do with the story I'm telling. I think it's just about churning out scenarios and bits of dialogue and letting them walk around and stretch their legs in the world, and that's how I can observe them and also get inside their head.
Maurice: You have a brilliant new memoir called I Came All This Way to Meet You: Writing Myself Home, which everyone is raving about. You've written many books in the past, but I believe this is your first non-fiction book. I imagine it's a different kind of challenge to produce that same sense of intimacy where you are the subject. Did you have to find your own weirdness to get it done? And the structure of it is fantastic. How did you decide on the structure of the book?
Jami: I am definitely weird, and the book is in part about that weirdness. All artists are weird, I think! My challenge was really to figure out how to dial it back enough to be consumable. In terms of the structure, I just dumped all the words I had into one big document and kind of dug my way out from there. I knew I had to create a bigger narrative arc out of all these smaller narrative arcs contained within these important moments and ideas from my life. It somewhat follows a linear timeline although I move around a bit within that timeline. Mostly I think it was about figuring out my personal growth arc, and how to represent that best -- sometimes that doesn't always follow a linear path, though. Important moments can show up in our lives and we often don't or can't recognize them till years later. Also everything in our lives -- past and present and future -- is sort of always happening at the same time anyway. I just felt my way around instinctively to figure out the best path for the information. In my mind there is a clear beginning, middle, and end to it all, though.
Maurice: Tell us about some of your favorite things.
Jami: You know I love books, love having piles of them everywhere in the house, but also I love giving books away so I can make room for new ones; that feeling of making room for the new is quite satisfying. I love writing, doing it and being done with it and then reading it and editing it and then re-reading it, because I love it when I write something beautiful or new (for me) or emotionally true; it really gets me in the gut when I'm at least a little bit good at my job. I love New Orleans, this city you and I both share, Maurice; for better or for worse, I love this complicated and beautiful town. I love big meals with friends, organizing them and having them both. I love really cold white wine on a hot summer day. I love swimming in the ocean. I love my little house. I love my dog.